Back in October of 1998, I was working graveyard shift as a cashier at the cafeteria inside the main Postal Distribution Center in Hartford , Ct. This is not a regular post office, but rather a gigantic building where they sort and proccess all the mail for Hartford County. The place is surrouded by high chainlink fences, and has its own Postal Police Substation. For those of you who don't know, the Postal Police are essentially Postal employees with guns and badges.

One day I was running really late, I got dressed, pulled on my grey overcoat, and dashed off to work in The Cat. When I arrived rather than search for a parking space in the main lot, I drove around to the rear executives lot and pulled into a space there, then dashed into the building, went to the cafeteria, tied on my apron, and started work.

About three hours later two Postal Police Officers showed up and asked "Is your last name Janowski?". When I agreed that it was they told me I'd better come with them and escorted my towards the little police substation in the building. On the way I asked if this had to do with my car, thinking perhaps it was illegally parked, or someone had hit it. However they refused to tell me.

Upon arrival to the substation, I was escorted over to where two nervous women where standing and one of the officers asked "Is this the guy?". When the women nodded yes, he then said "He works in the cafeteria, do you still want to press charges?" (no, really, he did. I later wrote it on the car)

I later got the full story. Apparently the women had been outside having a smoke when they saw a a car covered in quotes come roaring into the parking lot, then guy in a grey overcoat with long hair (I have a 10"+ long tail) get out and dash into the building.

They thought I was a terrorist.

And it had taken the Postal Police three hours to find me, less than 100 yards from their office.

Due to this incident, I have created a list of helpful ways to know someone is not a terrorist.

• 1) Terrorist don't usually drive really noticeable cars, they tend to try to be less obvious.
• 2) Terrorists tend not to got running into the building they want to destroy, especially not the building entrance furthest from the street.
• 3)Even assuming they do in fact do the above two things. Terrorists have never been known to then stand at the register of the cafeteria taking orders for the next three hours.